When your 9 year old calls B.S. on you, challenging your Spiritual beliefs.


 

 

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As we sat around the table, eating dinner last night Jax asked me, ” What’s the deal with all this GOD STUFF?! Your, like SUPER religious now!”His smooth, soft, pre-man hands hovered over his head as he spoke. They drew the shape of a half dome in the air around us. Like the image of Jesus you see on all the traditional Hallmark Christmas cards.
Stunned into silence, I poured my attention all over him. Exploring his face, the little mouth that declared I am now “religious.” Why did hearing him say that bother me?
 “I haven’t dragged you to church or sat you down to read the Bible or anything! Do you mean Spiritual? I have always been this way…Spiritual, I mean.”
My words fell into the veggie lasagna, short of making it into his ears and into his heart. They bounced off the force-shield he had around him. Jax had anticipated my explanation taking its usual esoteric turn about humanity. About the Rising consciousness bursting forth, and our place in it. How we must do more than embrace the Rising, but push it forward as well.

“You ALWAYS talk about God blessings, Grace, and practicing Gratitude. None of that helps. None of that matters in making my life better.” Jax, age 9

“You ALWAYS talk about God blessings, Grace, and practicing Gratitude. None of that helps. None of that matters in making my life better.” Jax’s eyebrow raised, declaring authority over the matter at hand.
“The goal isn’t to take time out to pray. It is to BE in a constant state of prayer; To BE…connected to God-source. Always.” My words felt void of power, fluttering around the table like petals of a dying flower.
“That is IMPOSSIBLE when God never shows up to help me.” Jax replied as if it were the end of the conversation.
Mike dropped his head and became over interested in the green beans on his dinner plate. “Here it comes…” said the thought bubble over his head. Luke, Ziva and I looked at each other, wide-eyed. It was as if a founding member of your club cast his members jacket at your feet. WTF?! My mind was humming- teachable moment- teachable moment. How can I get him to remember another time when he didn’t feel like this?! What should I say or do next?? I had nothing! I went to a place of bruised ego. Defeated, I told him I could leave him out of our discussions about God, the Universe and our choices made within it. I would be mindful not to include him in our spiritual rituals. No more Morning Intention God Blessings. I could even leave him out of the 3 G’s before bed (Gratitude, Evening God Blessings and Goodnight protection prayer).
….not my best moment in reflecting compassion, whoops.

“What if God has been with you the whole time? Helping you live a better life? …Because She is always there, you don’t know what it is like to be without her.”

Luke broke the silence and asked Jax, “What if God has been with you the whole time? Helping you live a better life? …Because She is always there, you don’t know what it is like to be without her. Maybe, you should practice NOT connecting with God for a week and see what happens. Maybe, you life will get SUPER Crappy!” He revealed with the excitement of a Mad Scientist.
Whoa. They do listen. They do remember. They know how to find their own way. My lesson, Again: Lips together. It is not about me and having all the answers. Sometimes, it’s about leaning back and not leaning in so hard.
I have been “doubling down” since January. Fulfilling this need to Push out and not letting the tide Pull me back in. All ocean waves must leave the land and return to the sea. I am remembering too.
My friend and Acutonics teacher says, “Life is a Dance!” Sometimes that Dance takes you to a place of forgeting …and rediscovering ourselves in a whole new way.
May you open your heart and hear the music. Release your toes so they may tap to the beat of the Universe that always has your back. Even if you have decided that you’ve been doing this entire journey alone. Maybe you will find your own Luke, to remind you that those are not your foot prints. That you have been carried the whole time.
Laugh hard. Love strong. Live to serve.
Best!
Kimberly
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#5words Sir Richard Branson Challenge


Inspired by Sir Richard Branson’s #5word challenge I asked myself, “Can I describe what I do in 5 words?” The answer was murky at best; are you asking the mommy-self, the writer-self, the activist-self, the educator-self,..the wife…the friend… (I’m a Gemini…we’re SUPPOSED to have a lot of “selfs” but I am sure you have more than a few in your pocket too;)

When it comes down to it, I believe my purpose on earth is to… Help people through my writing. But I love the simplicity of my motto… Laugh. Love…Serve …hey got it down to 3!

I got a kick out of my oldest son’s answer to the question above.

Luke to me, “Mom, your job is…To keep us safe…ha! I did it in 4 words!” he smiles.

Luke says about himself, “My job is… To help the little ones.”

Right on! What clarity for 8 years old; I think I had my nose in a book at 8 and hadn’t the slightest idea of what a Purpose was let alone have one of my own. I learn SO much from Luke it’s overwhelming at times.

A few weeks ago, I had a chance to teach him a thing or two 😉

 

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A few months ago I discovered a Mommy Recharging Station at CV Yoga with Andrea Spence. She teaches Yoga ropes on Fridays (anyone in the area check it out!!) One of the amazing benefits of having Andrea as an instructor is the super cool pics she takes of the students during class to enforce that anything is possible and that we CAN do unthinkable things. I would come home and show the victory of my efforts to the kids and they would go bananas!

“I wanna go! When can we try that?!” “I didn’t know Mama’s liked to play like that?!” …pretty great responses.

Andrea was gracious enough to welcome my oldest into her class when he was lucky enough to score a teacher work day one Friday.

When I experienced my first class and was told to “trust the rope” and “trust my body to hold me parallel to the floor” the chatter in my brain said NO WAY! RUN!! I obviously didn’t listen and had the time of my life pushing my own boundaries. Now it was Luke’s turn. Like the Champion he is. He knew my job was to keep him safe and wouldn’t ask him to try anything I thought would harm him. So…up he went! Amazing how he just needed a breath of encouragement and he took off like a Pro! Of course he could tackle the Yoga Ropes! He was safe, encouraged and eager to try something new. Now he is ready to teach the little ones….whooa…wait a minute….simmer down Luke!….though if he thinks his 5 year old brother and 3 year old sister are ready, maybe they are…after all Luke takes his job of helping the little ones pretty seriously.

Funny how the pure spirit of an 8 year old can sum up my job better than I can (4 words!) and knows his purpose too!

Do you know yours? Share it with me! Don’t forget to try the #5word challenge. Check out the link above and see what others have posted. Three Cheers for pursuing your purpose!

Laugh hard. Love strong. Live to serve.

Best!

Kimberly Crawford