Timeless life lessons from my grandmother that inspire courage, self-love, and resilience. A heartfelt tribute to wisdom only Lola can share.

The smell of Alhambra cigarillos and freshly cooked kaldereta will always remind me of my grandmother, Nieves—whom everyone called Lola Inang. Her hugs were tighter than anyone else's, and her wisdom? Unmatched.

I’ve always known her as Lola Inang, my maternal grandmother. “Inang” was what my mom and her siblings called her, so imagine my surprise when, in grade 4, we were asked to make a family tree, and I discovered her real name was Nieves. It made sense, though—calling her “Lola Inang” was like saying “Grandma Mom.”

She was the pride of her hometown in Bulacan, known for her beauty and strength. Her contemporaries told stories of how she was often chosen as the Reyna Elena during Flores de Mayo in her youth. But for me, she was the epitome of love and care. Summer vacations with her and my Lolo Tatang were filled with endless junk food, attention, and those magical, lingering kisses that felt like blessings.

At 98 years old, her wit and stories never faded. She had a way of teaching lessons through tales, and here are seven that I’ll carry with me forever:

1. Never Lie… Except When It Saves Lives

One night, long ago, when her kids were still young, robbers crept into their backyard. Their dogs started barking, waking the family. Fueled by the need to protect her children, Lola grabbed a hoe, wrapped it in cloth, and pretended it was a shotgun. She called out to the intruders, threatening to shoot if they didn’t leave. To her relief, the robbers shouted their apologies and fled.

And my Lolo? He was hiding in a corner, watching her bravery unfold.

The lesson? Bravery doesn’t always come from strength, it comes from love. And sometimes, a little bluff can save the day.

2. Smoking Is Bad… Sometimes

When I was young, I’d see Lola smoking Alhambra cigarillos, a type of Filipino cigarette made of dried tobacco leaves. What fascinated me most was how she smoked—with the burning end inside her mouth! Despite this unique habit, she always reminded me never to smoke when I grew up.

Her humor and contradictions taught me that life is rarely black and white.

3. True Wealth Is Having a Good Night’s Sleep

During one of her visits to Manila, she noticed my late nights as a college student. One evening, she sat beside me and said, “Apo, ang tunay na mayaman, hindi lang yung maraming pera, yung may sapat na tulog at pahinga, sila ang totoong mayaman. Tandaan mo yan.”

She explained how Manila’s hustle culture was cutting lives short, comparing it to her simpler provincial life where she could rest whenever she wanted. “Even if I don’t have much,” she said, “I’m my own boss, and I get to sleep when I want.”

Lola reminded me that rest is a form of wealth we often overlook.

4. Educate Women, Empower Generations

When she started raising her family, her parents advised against sending her daughters to school because money was tight. But Lola believed education was priceless.

Despite not finishing school herself, she worked hard to ensure all her children, including her daughters, got an education.

Because of her sacrifices, my mom became the strong, educated woman who raised me to value learning.

Lola’s determination reminds me that investing in women’s education can change not just one life but entire generations.

5. Ask (Fervently), and You Shall Receive

Even at 98, Lola’s memory was remarkably sharp. Mom once told me this was no accident, it was a direct answer to Lola’s prayers.

She had asked God to bless her with clarity of mind as she aged, and because of her faithfulness, He listened.

This taught me the power of prayer and persistence: when you ask with intention, the universe finds a way to deliver.

6. Love Yourself and Show It

Lola was a hardworking woman, but she always made time to care for herself. Her dresser was a treasure trove of colognes, face powders, and her ever-reliable Oil of Olay.

She didn’t see beauty rituals as vanity. For her, they were acts of self-respect.

Even as she spent her days doing chores, she carried herself with grace and dignity. She taught me that loving yourself is how you teach others to love and respect you.

It’s not just about looking good—it’s about loving who you are.

7. Plan for the Future—Including Retirement

Even in her old age, Lola lived simply and frugally. She could have spent more, but she chose to save, ensuring she had enough for hospital bills and senior care when she needed it.

Her foresight taught me the importance of preparing for the future, not just for yourself but for your family.

She showed me that financial independence is a gift you give not only to yourself but also to your loved ones.

Two months shy of her 101st birthday, the Lord called her back. During her wake, there were no tears—only beautiful memories and laughter as we celebrated her incredible life.

I’ve always looked up to my mom—she’s the voice inside my head. But my grandmother’s words hold the wisdom behind her voice.

Lola Inang’s lessons weren’t just for her family, they’re for anyone looking to live a life full of love, courage, and grace.

So, to anyone reading this: What lessons have you learned from your grandparents?

"One of the best things in life is when you hug your grandma and she hugs you back even tighter."

Ella is the chief hu-mom at LastMomStanding.com. Once a chronic starter, she’s now finishing what she begins and rewriting her story. When she’s not creating content, Ella is exploring new challenges, enjoying good books, or planning her next adventure. Come say hi—she’d love to connect!

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