Blessings


A sleepy house. Alone with my thoughts (sounds much more romantic than it really is.) 11:56 PM, 2011; reflection consumes me. I can’t seem to get past reviewing this very evening, let alone the year that has fallen through my fingers. 

 A few hours earlier, Mike danced around the kitchen creating his traditional Lobster New Year’s Feast. The boys were more interested in posing for pictures with the poor crustaceans than filling eager bellies. As Mike prepared the shelled beasts for their final bath, Luke pleaded for us to reconsider his request of keeping one as a pet. Not a chance kid.

When Mike presented the dinner, Luke wasn’t interested in eating the remains of his ill fated friend and gorged himself on gluten free noodles and salad. 

Jax was over dinner entirely and felt it was his sole mission that evening to be the table’s “lemon czar”. Even after taking away the bowl of quartered citrus, he’d somehow manage to make some re-appear.

“Where is he getting these?” I kept asking Mike, as if he had some inside intel and wasn’t sitting across from me, watching the same scene unfold. 

“Mmmmmooorre lemon?” he would purr as he strangled the pulp and seeds of the mangled fruit into the butter, nearly knocking the lobster tail off my plate. “Hmmm?” His eyes sparkled and I couldn’t help but laugh. At three years old, Jax has the crooked, Captain Jack Sparrow grin down and was showing it off while squeezing the life out of yet another rouge lemon.

With Ziva balanced on my lap, I surveyed my dinner table and smiled. I am blessed. Stealing a glimpse at each of them, I desperately tried to take a mental snapshot of the moment: A sentimental husband who worked hard to fulfill a family tradition, even though three of this years guests were 5 and under and would have been happy with noodles and jam. My oldest son, the “pet” collector. His heart so enormous, so tender, it sometimes takes my breath away. My son, Jax; juice dripping from his elbows and through his tiny fingers, his grin consuming his face. Offering me tart lemony kisses. My baby blessing; blue-eyed bunny-boo Ziva. Her eyes, a light-house guiding my sense of motherhood to a whole new horizon.

My heart breaks with gratitude. Happy 2012 my beautiful ones.

Laugh Hard. Love Strong. Live to Serve.

-Kimberly Crawford


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